New Game to Play

The other day Oneson and I watched midday TV about Alaskan single engine planes and the adventurous people who fly them daily. There are many places in Alaska which can only be reached by plane. One man at age 55, who always live in the lower states, took a job as caretaker of a remote island resort above Nome. On occasion he had to make flights south for supplies. On his return due to weather they turned back the first day, day two the weather allowed them to make the trip home. Places like this have no phone service or TV, they still use ship to shore communication system. [They didn't mention using computers for emergency communications, perhaps they are not positioned for satellites] but more southern Anchorage has good service just like the lower states.

There are other remote place with a few people on islands who must depend on regular supply flights. Some have their supplies purchased for them and delivered rather than make the to and from flight themselves. The problem is weather conditions which often makes flight impossible, if there are health emergencies they are often forced to wait till the weather clears and in extreme conditions have no way of communicating with anyone off the island. The question was posed Why would anyone choose to live this remote? when they could choose other places with complete privacy but better access to civilization. The question goes unanswered =they just do as a preference. I started to think about this cause I love my privacy and the feeling of being alone with the sounds of nature or it's silence. Then I realized how what I feel is backed with the knowing civilization is always in reach, I've never truly been so remote that there is limited or no contact with it, most of us haven't.....

Then suddenly the feeling of being this completely estranged came over me. In that moment I knew what it would be to completely be without civilization.The feeling could only be related as Fear..it was total emptiness of the world around me..feeling I was the only one in my world. Alone with nature is one thing when there is a way to connect, this feeling left no way and was something completely new felt in the pit of my stomach. It was then I realize how different cultures relate to being alone and being dependent upon others, and how this dependency leaves us in fear when we don't have what we have come to being there. The idea of that remote island was quite uninviting with the prospect of being their with no one and nothing else I've come to depend on. Definitely a nightmarish bad dream, and here I'd always considered me self-reliant and independent of society.

It was not the thought which was fear, but the feeling of being without the things of civilization which I depended upon. Last fall when we were without electric for a week I realize I was very self-sufficient, but I was never without civilization or the things it provides which I've come to rely on. At any given moment I could traveled to connect to that which has actually become part of my cellular self as my reality. It was in that moment too I came to recognize there is work needed to undo this dependency on modern day society and the services it provides. [I'm starting from the memory of this feeling and it relates to the feeling I use to get being without a car..I've had one since I was 16..just the idea of being without comes with a fear also, this too is dependency of things outside myself and beyond what Mother Nature provides naturally.]

I'm going to start playing a new game with myself of eliminating something I depend on for a few days until I get that feeling of confidence I had last fall when I got a system going without electric. Maybe this experienced emotion will be passed on to the collective for their greater good. If not maybe at least I will be better prepared to live in a world in which there is nothing left to be dependent upon...Except my inner strength.