Monday, July 18, 2011

Finding Our JOY

Finding our joy isn't always the easiest thing in today's world, and for some it never has been. Was rudely reminded of this today at 5:30am when stepping to the bottom of the curved stairway leading to Oneson's attic room and asked "Are you up". The response "couldn't you just say Good-morning". No shock! cause every response from this less than happy being is derogatory in some way. One would think there would be gratitude if someone who has no reason is considerate enough to make sure you've heard your alarm before they go off on their own day. Not so with less than happy people because nothing said or done meets expectations.

Here is a big part of where JOY lies ~ the level of expectation we hold within. This is something I recognized before my teens with my mother. Fortunately in recognition I saw it wasn't just with me, but my father sister and the world at large, so it wasn't taken personal, or I didn't think it was. Mother's level of expectation always exceeded what the world offered. I quietly observed her response to others and her comments about neighbors friends family never holding up to her expectations making her a joyless person. Note I said joyless not sad. Most times we will find unhappiness comes from expectations not being met. Carry expectation and we leave ourselves wide open to be disappointed in people and outcomes. This morning for the first time I've realized this is where my son comes from. He has always been the most defensive, argumentative, grumbling person I've ever known, even his sisters and friends commented on this when he was a child. He has mothers quality of holding expectation and is always disappointed and always joyless.

Having said this I turn it on myself because I know I'm creating this perception from within to be expressed as my outer experience. Why? because it's all part of the grander way in which we choose to experience and learn in this reality. For me I chose a parent and child who enhanced the People Pleaser characteristic in me. It's my way of learning about emotional detachment and letting go so I can "live in this world by the knowing I'm not of it" during this new cycle energy. Being a PP is a response trying to live up to expectations held by others, and part of learning to detach personal emotion from the true feeling which accompany experiences. When we feel it's from the heart, so learning to live and think from the heart, not the mind, requires learning the difference of emotion created from entanglement of perception and beliefs, and true feeling from life experience of the actual event in the moment. I honor and am grateful to these beings for playing this role in my life so I can learn how not to be a PP because that keeps me bound to thinking myself the human and unable to function as the higher essence of self. In reality we must please ourselves by finding our JOY within, not from meeting the expectation held to please others.
Wow does this cast some new light on detaching from the physical so we can become the new advanced human beings.

No comments: