What directs our choice is intuitively knowing :
"Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure, and must take full responsibility for it."
How do you view the outer expression your life?
Did I say I was dense, well many times I just don't notice. Lately though life has been more flowing because Spirit was pushing that idea to be noticing what is being reflected as our lives. Now I didn't do much noticing before knowing this is just a passing through experience, it is what it is, and I have all the stuff in my chart that says I'm one to take life serious anyway. And I do. So being between this rock of knowing life is illusion and a hard place of taking it serious, I fought it and it never really worked as I'm constantly telling myself to lighten up. Like this thing in last blog is really bothering me, and I've run it over and over in my head as if I'm going to have to justify myself to someone, and I really know better than to think this way cause it's just a dinner for a religious holiday I no longer celebrate. Thus more evidence of doing it to please others. It holds no importance in my life any longer, what is important is my enjoying what will most likely be my hockey teams last game of the season; knowing after this I go into hockey withdrawal.
Even the good things end up being hard choices these days. Daughter invited us to Easter Dinner, biggie for her since she works and endlessly carts her boys 10 & 12 to meetings and sports. She is a good example of making the best of life as husband who is all about self use to argue about getting His house dirty so holidays were eat-out occasions if someone didn't cook for them, guess the economy has effected his business income.? She manages to create her own happiness, something she says she learned from me. My reservation on the invite was IF they had the sport channel so I could watch Flyers Hockey which is in playoffs. It's 2 & 2, 5th game Friday, 6th on Sunday (Best of 7) it makes that one game the determiner of being in finals played at dinner hour 3-7p.m. Having watched every game all season doesn't want to miss the one. Said she'd cook dinner and bring it cause they don't have the channel, not only unfair to her, boys will be stuck inside with rain and none of their techie stuff. It's impossible to socialize while watching a game with visitors that aren't interested. Maybe not so good when a sport comes before family, but these days family is somewhat stressful even without the other. Love them, but they totally live old paradigm reality where life centers around materialism of Money, Education, Titles and Possessions. Understand and accept that as their choice, having been part of the old paradigm concept, but, they are completely closed minded to new paradigm beliefs. or even the idea that this a New Cycle for humanity. This makes any visit unrealistic causing me to step back into that illusion that is no longer my reality, when open conversation is turned off as their religion holds them in a mind set that says anything but their belief is blasphemy (this is Easter). 
This is The Hour and I've giving over total effort to noticing the vibration of energy coming from within my deeper thoughts creating my surface mind expressions. Saw myself checking myself and taking mind tweezers to extract the remainder of those limiting beliefs which no longer apply but had accumulated over years in Cellular Memory Consciousness. It was like stepping aside of myself to watch the movie ME in transformation.